Copyright 2004 james@miracleofmeditation.com

How to be happy with who you are NOT! - or in other words;

"How to go from day to day, beating yourself up, so that others don't have to".

Here are the steps -

The keywords here are DO - HAVE - BE

1. Find as many reasons as possible why you should hate yourself for the things that you DO.

Some examples here could be;

I eat too much,
I smoke too much,
I drink too much,
I get angry too often,
I can't control my aggression,
I never talk back,
I am too assertive,
I am too bossy,
I never speak up for myself,
I'm always spending money I don't have,
I am too mean with my money,
I never find time to relax,
I waste too much time,
I never exercise,
I exercise too much,
I never sit quietly,
I am always in a hurry,
I never slow down,
I am too lazy - and sit around too much,
I never do anything right,
I am too perfect.

2. Find as many reasons as you can for why you should hate yourself for the things that you HAVE.

Some suggestions here could be;

I wish I didn't have children,
I wish I had children,
My children never do what I tell them,
My children never listen to me,
My wife/husband doesn't understand me,
My parents never listen to me,
My parents never help me,
My parents don't care,
My car is too small, too old, too rusty,
My house is too cluttered, old, small, cold, hot,
My bank balance is too low,
My job is too boring,
My friends never call me,
My health is always failing me,
I don't have enough skills,
I have too many skills - I'm flighty

3. Find as many reasons as you can for why you should hate yourself for who you are (or how you BE).

Some examples here could be,

I worry too much,
I don't worry enough,
I have an addictive personality,
I gamble too much with life,
I don't take enough risks,
I can't get over the past,
I can't remember my childhood,
Nothing seems to help,
I gave up long ago,
Nobody cares about little old me,
I can't ever get myself motivated,
I never follow through on anything,
I always say and do the same old things,
I have no imagination,
I am the sort of person who could never change,
I am still stuck,
Nobody likes me,
I can't stand up for myself,
I am too assertive and bossy,
I am too tense,
I am too stressed,
I am too relaxed about life,
I could never change,
I always say no,
I always say yes,
I have no fashion sense,
I am too fashionable,
I have a rotten past,
In the past I was too protected and pampered,

and so on, I'm sure you can think of some more which will be even more apt.

If you should find yourself faltering in your determination to become an expert at these strategies, just remind yourself that you have probably already become quite good at some of them without any real conscious effort!

But like all good programming, you will have to practice on a daily basis to gain real and lasting benefit as well as masterful expertise ;-)

You're not there just yet; there is more work you will need to do.

The next 3 keywords to work on are;

THINK - FEEL - BEHAVE

Blame yourself for these next three in series.
Some suggestions for you follow each keyword;

4. THINK

I think too much,
I don't think enough,
I have no imagination,
My imagination runs riot,
My thoughts are cluttered,
I never have any good thoughts,
I have no clarity,
I can't focus on things,
I always focus on the wrong thing,
I can't think straight - ever,
I have no good ideas,
I have too many ideas,
I can't control my thoughts,
I control my thoughts too much,
I am always right,
I am always wrong,

5. FEEL

I feel bad all the time,
I feel too good - it can't last,
I can't control my feelings,
I am too self-controlled,
I don't have any feelings - I'm numb,
I have too many feelings,
I make people feel bad,
Other people make me feel bad,
I feel inferior,
I feel too superior,
I am under confident,
I am over confident,
I am too shy,
I am too arrogant

6. BEHAVE

I behave badly,
I am too well behaved,
I am not nice enough to people,
I am too nice to people,
I work too hard,
I don't work hard enough,
I am too loving,
I am not loving enough,
I am not motivated - I get nothing effective done,
I am too motivated - and never find time for family,
I play at things too much,
I don't play enough,
I shout too much,
I am too quiet,
I am too fit - I can't sit still,
I am too unfit - I feel unhealthy,
I can't express my opinions,
I am overbearing

Phew - you don't have to do them all at once ;-)

A daily recitation of each of the 6 strategies should help. Choose one of the series and concentrate on just one strategy each week. In six weeks you should be there - now you will never need anyone else to beat you up - you can do it all by yourself!

That should do it! You are now well on the way to learn now

"How to be happy with who you are NOT!"

Or in other words

"How to go from day to day, beating yourself up, so that others don't have to".

But don't congratulate yourself too much, after all you may not be able to keep it up ;-)

One final thought for you, "What we resist - persists".

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James Middleton
Hypnotherapist and Meditator
james@miracleofmeditation.com


Copyright 2004 James Middleton

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